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‘Rambler Ramblings’ Category

  1. Thanksgiving Buffet

    November 23, 2014 by admin

    54952_cornicopia_mdWe love Thanksgiving!  It’s one of the most popular holidays at the TR household.  We count down to it, decorate for it, and just love it!

    Bluey has been talking for weeks about his plans to watch the Thanksgiving parade and we all love the relaxed pace of the day.  We sometimes watch a bunch of movies, or even a little bit of a football game.  We’ve been excitedly going through the grocery store, taking note of special food items here and there that would be perfect for our feasting.

    One thing that’s not perfect for us?  A big sit-down meal.

    We’re just not into it.  We love food and we love eating.  But we don’t like to force ourselves into a drawn out holiday sit-down meal.

    And here’s why:  we’ve done the big Thanksgiving traditional meal and found that it hampers our day.  A day that could be spent in fun and games, silly TV, and walks in the woods instead becomes a day wrapped around a tight schedule.  In order for all that food to come out at the same time for a formal family meal, it needs to be carefully timed out.  The day is spent prepping food instead of relaxing and connecting with family.  We’d rather be free to look at one another and declare: “Let’s go for a walk!” and not worry about whether that means the potatoes will be done in time.

    And then there’s the matter of satisfying everyones tastes.  Rather than cook up a bunch of food that might not be eaten due to the whims of some family members preferences, we like to present a food plan that leaves everyone happy without any worries about who’s eating what.

    We offer a Thanksgiving buffet.

    Our buffet includes all manners of foods: hot and cold; salty and sweet; filling and light.  We select a wide range of items like homemade bread, cheese and crackers, nuts, various unique dips, chips, salad fixings and a few holiday favorites like mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce.  We bring everything out in waves, a few selections at a time, whenever we feel it’s time for something new.

    For our family, this plan leaves everyone well fed without anyone being stuck in the kitchen all day.  Our whole family is free to take up whatever activities we like without worries about getting home at a particular time, nor concerns about ‘spoiling your appetite’ before the big meal.  Everyone eats what they want, when they want, allowing us to enjoy our time as a family and appreciate what we have.

    And isn’t that the idea?

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  2. Landspeed Record

    November 14, 2014 by admin

    TRMom and Dad can both run 20 yards in one second flat. You might not think we were so swift judging by our physiques/ interest in running. Yet there we are, challenging the Flash to a footrace.

    Bluey’s snoozing in bed, late into the night, and he starts crying out: “Daddy! Mommy!”

    We don’t know what’s the matter, but we know we’re needed.62590_boydad_sm

    Trust us, the high school track coach never saw us move that fast.

    Is he sick? Is it a bad dream? We’ll probably never know, he usually can’t tell us what happened. But Bluey knows that when he calls, we come running. We are there for him- unapologetically there for him- whenever he needs us.

    And should your kiddo jump into the deep end of the pool while you are standing in the shallows, you’ll find yourself putting Michael Phelps to shame as you race across the water.

    We’re all capable of amazing things when called upon.

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  3. The RC Auto Club

    November 12, 2014 by admin

    On a recent hiking trip, we emerged from our forest fun to find the previously empty parking lot filled with half a dozen sport utility vehicles and a number of people milling around.

    “What have we bumped into here?” we thought.

    It was a group of eight or ten men aged between twenty years old and up to about about sixty.  Several of them wore the clothes one might associate with hunting.  Since this happened to be the first day of deer hunting season, we began to fear that we had stumbled onto some sort of hunting expedition.IMG_8694

    But our concerns soon disappeared as we realized that we were approaching a group of radio controlled car enthusiasts!

    They had brought their collection of RC monster trucks and jeeps to the woods to race through the leaves and see whose car could scale the steepest hill, or crawl over the biggest rocks.  We chatted them up, aided by Bluey’s many questions about how these cars worked and who built them.

    They were the friendliest bunch of guys you could hope to run into!  They were more than happy to show off their cars unique capabilities and to explain how they functioned.  They said they’d just come back from a big meet up in Arkansas, driving 15 hours each way to race their trucks through the trails.

    Bluey was thrilled and immediately wanted to join their club and go racing with them.

    IMG_8697We were glad to have talked to them and wished we weren’t on a bit of a time crunch to get TRDad to work.  We gladly would have spent all afternoon with these nice gentlemen.

    Instead we drove home talking about cars and vowing to research their club to try to get Bluey involved.  Our son charged up his own remote controlled truck as soon as he got home and then drove it around the neighborhood.

    We were thrilled to have met these guys and happy that our decision to interact with these strangers was the right one.  We met a group of people we could easily have over-looked or actively avoided, people who pursue a hobby that our young son finds fascinating.

    All for the simple effort of  choosing to say “Hello!”

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  4. “I Know.”

    November 5, 2014 by admin

    IMG_7314Sample TR Household dialogue:

    “You’re a great kid.”

    — ‘I know.’

    There are few points in parenting more satisfying than hearing your child assert their own goodness.

    Our kids know they are good kids because we tell them.  We point out when they do the right thing, be it holding the door for someone, or saying they are sorry for something, or offering to help someone else.  They are good kids.

    This doesn’t mean they never do wrong.  Of course they do.  They make mistakes.  They get angry.  They say a hurtful thing.

    But nothing they do changes their basic nature-  they are good kids.  Good kids who make errors.  Who have lapses in judgment.

    So when Bluey or Plum make a mistake, we can address the error without questioning their goodness. Good people screw up on occasion.  Good people have bad moments and bad days.

    Our hope is two-fold:

    1. We hope when our kids are admitting to mistakes, or caught up in a mistake, they remember not to internalize it.

    2. We hope that when our kids find other people erring towards them, they remember that people are generally good and that our kids treat those around them with compassion and understanding.  Doing a bad thing doesn’t make you a bad person.

    You’re a good kid.

     

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  5. The Joy of Listening

    November 2, 2014 by admin

    IMG_8618_2Our Bluey adores audiobooks.  He has a solid collection of classics, modern fiction, history, and poetry on tape.  Most of these we’ve picked up at book sales and garage sales.  As his interest in audiobooks has grown, we keep an eye out for new stock when we are out and about.

    We’ve managed to find for Bluey books that he knows well- like several of the Ramona (by Beverly Cleary) series as well as new discoveries- like a reading of American history that he really enjoys.  (As libraries shift to digital content for audio books, many are shedding their collection of cassette books.  So keep your eye out for these sales!)

    Having books on tape allows Bluey to have further control over what books he’s experiencing at any given point.   It gives him a chance to relisten to his favorite parts as often as he likes.  And his audio books give him the opportunity to hear a different voice from his parents- a voice that might pronounce some words differently, or add emphasis in unexpected places.

    Bluey’s tapes on foreign languages help prepare him for using more advanced self-study tools including mp3s and podcasts.  And hearing a language spoken out loud is an essential part in mastering it.

    Bluey usually plays his tapes on a very old, very beat up Fisher-Price tape recorder.  It still works perfectly and has been handed down from his oldest sister.  The cassette player allows Bluey to transport his books with him from room to room, or even into the car.IMG_8619

    The discovery and now love of cassette tapes also has allowed Bluey to explore new technologies.  He’s learned to work the tape deck on the stereo system we have in our playroom.  He’s learned to how to rewind tapes that get spun out of the cassette, and the related importance of not getting the tapes tangled.

    Best of all, audiobooks are helping move our Bluey along on the path to becoming a full-on, independent reader.  As he fine tunes his notions of when and where he reads, and chooses the book he’s most interested in at that moment, Bluey carves his own path in literacy.

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  6. Sick Day

    October 29, 2014 by admin

    The TR Family makes efforts to limit screen time and maximize activity, especially outdoor activity.  There is hardly a day when we aren’t out for a walk or a bike ride, or reading books rather than sitting in front of one more TV show.boy_33_sm

    But when a TR family member is down for the count with an illness, we are much more flexible with the house rules.

    When a kiddo (or adult) is sick that may mean we enjoy a movie at home.  We usually curtail or eliminate our walks around the neighborhood with the dog or biking off to the local grocery for a fun treat.  Instead we focus on restful activities and certain sick day indulgences, like extra popsicles to soothe a sore throat.

    It’s okay to make exceptions to your family routine for unique times like holidays and illnesses.  We don’t normally spend long periods watching television, but sometimes that sort of ‘spoiling’ is just what the doctor ordered.   We’re not afraid to let the rules shift for a day or so, as long as we know we can get back on track when the atypical event passes.

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  7. Storage Solutions

    October 26, 2014 by admin

    Today we decorated our house and yard for Halloween.  What fun!  Mini tombstones, leaf bags colored like pumpkins, ghosts and pumpkin candles- we had a great time with it.  Decorating for the holidays is one of the highlights for this enthusiastic family.

    IMG_2170We make events easier by having a storage tote or two dedicated to each holiday.  The cry goes out: let’s bring up the decorations! And thanks to our simple system, in a just a few minutes every one is finding decorations to set up all about the house and yard.  No agonizing over crushed or broken cardboard boxes and damaged holiday treasures.  No worries that some decorations will be lost in the basement/attic/closet.  Everything is in one easy to find space.

    We use large 18 gallon bins for our storage system.  We looked for bins that were:

    1.  Sturdy:  We want our system to last for years, so we sought out heavy duty totes that wouldn’t need to be constantly replaced.

    2.  Stackable:  In a world of limited space, we wanted our system to be able to go vertical.  Originally, our items were stored in a hall closet, so full use of vertical space is essential.

    3. Big, but not too big:  We needed our totes to be large enough to hold a fair amount, but small enough to be easily carried up and down the stairs.

    We have a separate tote (or totes) for each holiday.  Keeping each event in a separate space lets you keep better track of what you have on hand and maintains order of your decorations.

    So as you swing into the holiday season, use this as a chance to reorganize your decorations.  You’ll love it next year when everything is safe and easy to find.

     

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  8. Gender Frustration

    October 22, 2014 by admin

    49493_assyria_king_sm

    This TRFamily doesn’t enforce gender roles.  We allow our son Bluey to pick out sparkly light-up shoes marketed to girls, if that is where his heart leads him.  And we encourage our daughter, Plum, to fight against gender stereotypes as well as embrace make-up, if that is her desire.  We have never instructed our kids to put back a toy because it is for the opposite gender.  Nor have we ever encouraged them to “be a man” or “act like a lady.”  The list of examples could go on and on and on.

    We think that this philosophy is a big part of what causes gender confusion for adults and children when first encountering Bluey.  Yes, Bluey has an incredible head of very curly hair.  But there are many hip young boys that have longer hair styles.  Yes, Bluey will occasionally choose to wear pink, or another clothing item that is seen by the masses as “girly.”  But many boys and men are breaking out of the stereotypical male color spectrum and clothing styles.

    So what causes so many people to question our son’s gender?  What is the reason that children constantly ask Bluey if he is a boy or a girl?  Bluey doesn’t have overtly feminine characteristics.  He doesn’t bring any beloved dolls, or other stereotypically female toys, on our outings.  Bluey doesn’t refer to himself as a girl.  He isn’t questioning his identity or declaring his gender to be female.

    Bluey does have a strong nurture trait.  He is incredibly talkative.  Bluey likes to engage with others while playing versus running amok destroying things and killing the enemy.  He will happily play with either gender that will accept his friendship- girls are not “gross” to Bluey.  He will admire a friend’s Barbie doll with as much attention as he will a friend’s brand new Transformer.  Bluey watches My Little Pony with as much enthusiasm as he has for the latest Lego Ninjago episode.  And did we mention that he likes to converse?

    It is sad that these characteristics in a young boy seem to throw off the population at large. Everyone seems to second guess their initial assumption that Bluey is a boy.  Shouldn’t a boy be much less interested in conversation?  Shouldn’t a boy want to only play with the other boys?  Why is this boy before me wearing pink?  He must really be a girl!

    We hear all the time, “She has such beautiful hair!”  On rare occasion, Bluey will reply “I’m a boy,” or “I’m a he.”  But usually Bluey ignores the pronoun directed toward him.  What weighs heavily on TRMom and TRDad is that there is any suggestion of confusion in the first place. Our Bluey is comfortable with himself- do these conversations make him question whether or not he is okay?

    Why is society so focused on boxing people up into neat little packages?  And why must our son, at five, have to deal with almost daily intrusions upon his gender identity?  What does it matter, people!  We rarely correct anyone when they identify Bluey as female.  It just doesn’t matter to us, and we don’t want Bluey to think that there is anything wrong with him.

    Recently, a little girl met Bluey at the park and they played happily for about 20 mintues.  The girl ran up to her mom and declared, “Bluey is my new friend. She’s awesome.”  The mother felt the need to correct her daughter, “I think Bluey is a little boy.”  And quick as that, the girl turned around to Bluey stating, “You’re a boy. I’m not playing with you.”

    It’s moments like these that stump us.  Why does the Mom need to correct this gender slip of her daughter’s?  And why is her daughter’s response OK?  Why do kids as young as four years old already believe that they can only play with friends of the same gender?

    Bluey’s long time friends constantly criticize Bluey’s choices by saying things like- “Oh. that’s a girl’s shirt.”  Or “That’s a girl’s TV show.”  No amount of discussion with the friends- “There’s no such thing as a girl’s shirt.  It’s just a shirt-” can penetrate the mountains of gender conformity pressure that kids experience today.

    It makes us very sad,  But we are incredibly grateful that our Bluey dares to do his own thing, in his own beautiful way.  Regardless of society’s loud suggestion that he should change.

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  9. Talking To Strangers: We Encourage It

    October 8, 2014 by admin

     

    IMG_8076

    Perhaps against majority’s opinion or advice, we love talking to strangers. On our TR journeys large and small, some of our best take away moments are the conversations with the few people we have met along the way.  We do talk to strangers regularly and we encourage our kids to do it, too!

    We recently stopped for a quick lunch at a favorite local chain. As we were leaving, TRMom was suggesting to the kids that they make a stop in the bathroom. An elderly gentleman was sitting nearby and he interjected, “That’s some good advice!”

    Rather than ignoring this unfamiliar man or giving a dismissive smile, we struck up conversation with him. We shook hands, introduced our family, and chatted for a few minutes. As we were leaving, he declared, “You should have my card.”

    Priceless!

    Tip: There is a huge difference between talking to strangers and heeding the whims or demands of strangers. We would encourage you to teach your kids how to IMG_8104recognize this subtlety and judge for your own family what works best.

    Allowing ourselves to engage with others only enhances our experiences and our connections to the world. We are all so isolated already thanks to Facebook, Snapchat, Texting, etc. These apps only give the illusion of connection. We don’t want our children to miss out on in-person, every day interaction with another human being.

    Humans are social animals.  We talk to each other and hopefully, we make connections.  If you only speak to people in your immediate circle, you severely limit your life experience.  So we chat people up when in stores or walking down the street- everywhere.  We encourage our young ones to introduce themselves and to share their thoughts with others.

    We meet so many interesting folks this way: the Korean War vet, the self-taught artist, the long time resident of town.  We’ve heard many stories from many people.  We encourage you to give it a try.  Talk to people and listen to what they have to say.  Who knows who you’ll meet next?

    They might just make your day.  Or you just might make theirs.

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  10. You Tube Inspires

    September 17, 2014 by admin

    Robot TruckWe’ve recently started a new routine at our house. Each weekday morning, TRDad and Bluey spend a few minutes surfing YouTube. It’s quickly become a valued part of our day.

    What’s so good about YouTube? Well, we find it inspires us to go out and do things, create things, learn things.

    Yes, YouTube is filled with videos of funny dogs and karaoke. But it is also filled with cool building projects, information on home repairs, science projects and classic comedy.

    For example, Bluey recently spent the day trying to make a Lego robot, because he saw one on YouTube. Forget that we don’t have the expensive Lego Remote Control- Bluey didn’t let that slow him down. He headed for our Lego supply, mashed it up with some K’Nex and had a great creative morning. He then moved on to constructing a bunch of unique Lego cars and planes of his own design.

    Other days, he has created science projects, reenacted complex video stories, and practiced his silly walks- all based on what he has seen on YouTube.Silly Walks

    So we welcome YouTube into our daily lives- who knows what we’ll be inspired to do next?

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